Now playing Season 1, Episode 13 — Chapter 6 - Conflict Goal #5: Process Fights and Regrettable Incidents
December 5, 2025
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Season 1 • 19 episodes
This module provides an introduction to The Gottman Institute, our Clinical Training programs, and Drs. John and Julie Gottman. John and Julie welcome you to the course and describe the workshop format and resources. We introduce the research and theory behind Gottman Method Couples Therapy. We'll explore what makes relationships succeed or fail.
Dr. Julie Gottman introduces the assessment model used in Gottman Method Couples Therapy, and describes the couple’s experience coming into the assessment phase. You’ll learn ways to determine when couple therapy is contraindicated or in need of supplementation. This module also provides keys to assessing resistances and chaos..
Dr. Julie Gottman introduces the eight components of the couple’s assessment session 1 and offers an in-depth look at the Sampling Couple Conflict Interaction. Dr. John Gottman provides background and research behind the Oral History Interview, and explains how to use it to assess couples.
Dr. John Gottman provides background and research behind the written questionnaires, and describes their use during assessment. This module also includes a demonstration of the Gottman Relationship Checkup online assessment tool. You can use this tool to administer the questionnaires and quickly evaluate the results and recommended interventions.
Dr. Julie Gottman begins with an overview of session 2, which consists of individual sessions with each partner.
Dr. Julie Gottman describes session 3, where the couple comes together to learn the assessment findings and discuss a treatment plan with the therapist. This segment includes video of actual couple therapy sessions.
Audience discussion and Q&A with the Drs. Gottman.
Dr. John Gottman introduces the philosophy of Gottman Method Couples Therapy and describes the basic one dozen assumptions. He then presents an overview of the therapy, including the primary goals.
Dr. John Gottman presents the Gottman-Rapoport Intervention. This is followed by a recording of Dr. Julie Gottman using the Conflict Blueprint with a couple, Paul and Shantel, during a therapy session.
Julie describes how to intervene during therapy sessions to eliminate the Four Horsemen and replace them with their antidotes. She shares video of the interventions in action during a therapy session with Paul and Shantel.
Julie describes the Dreams Within Conflict intervention and presents video of the intervention in use during a therapy session with Paul and Shantel.
Julie describes the six skills that are essential to constructive conflict management. She introduces several tools you can use to help couples develop the six skills.
Julie introduces a tool to help couples process fights and regrettable incidents. She shares video of Paul and Shantel using the tool during a therapy session. John and Julie answer audience questions about interventions.
Dr. John Gottman discusses the importance of building Love Maps and how to use the Love Map card decks. In video of a therapy session, Dr. Julie Gottman guides Paul and Shantel as they work together on a Love Map exercise.
John tells the story of the Stress Reducing Conversation and how it became a part of the therapy practice. In a recorded therapy session, Julie helps Paul and Shantel learn to listen their partner to develop understanding and increase empathy.
John presents the research that supports the need for couples to build rituals of connection. In a recorded therapy session, Julie works with Paul and Shantel as they envision rituals to celebrate their marriage.
Julie describes the importance of creating shared purpose in the couple building a life together. In a recorded therapy session, Julie helps Paul and Shantel discuss an issue important to both of them. They explore their beliefs and identify the values they share.
Julie and John describe the process of implementing Gottman Method Couples Therapy. They provide examples of how to apply the interventions to best meet the needs of your clients.
The module begins with a description of an upcoming in-person Level 2 workshop. Check the Events schedule at https://www.gottman.com/events/ for the most accurate workshop schedule. The Drs. Gottman then address questions from the audience. Discussion includes general information about Gottman Method Couples Therapy, as well as ideas for handling specific incidents audience members have experienced in their professional practice.
Join the thousands of clinicians worldwide who have completed Level 1 and 2 Training in Gottman Method Couples Therapy.
Julie introduces a tool to help couples process fights and regrettable incidents. She shares video of Paul and Shantel using the tool during a therapy session. John and Julie answer audience questions about interventions.
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